When an outspoken guy like me criticizes the political left as often as I do, many people leap to the conclusion that I must be a right-wing conservative. Of course I’m not; I’m a libertarian, never vote for Republicans, and never will.

This is a common problem with us libertarians. Progressives call us right-wingers and right-wingers call us liberals (American definition). In both cases they’re wrong, but Societal Programming incorrectly teaches the world that there are only two options to political discourse: the left and the right. Now pick one, you asshole, so I know whether or not to agree with you or hate you.

Ah, if life were so simple.

Today I’m going to explain exactly why I’m not a conservative or right-winger, and how I actually disagree with right-wingers more often than I do left-wingers.

Here we go:

1. I am anti-war and vehemently anti-empire.

Conservatives are fearful. They look out at the world and see a dangerous, dark place, full of threats and peril. The answer to this, they say, is to spend trillions of dollars and send the military all over the planet, attack and bomb various countries, and then occupy those countries for 70+ years (as in America’s case with Germany and Japan).

Allow me to quote myself from my article on how to handle terrorism:

It is not the US taxpayer’s job to spend billions of dollars to send in bombers or soldiers any time any group of jerks attacks another group of jerks anywhere on planet Earth. It’s not our responsibly, we can’t do it successfully anyway, we screw things up whenever we try, and we can’t afford it with our trillions of dollars of debt.

Exactly. If you really think it’s our job to make sure everyone on planet Earth never misbehaves, you can’t say you’re for small government. You’re for massive government, as most modern-day conservatives are. America spends trillions of dollars policing the world. This is not small government.

I do believe that we Americans should have a very powerful, effective, lethal military, but I want that military to stay here and not do anything unless our borders are invaded. Which is the point of a military in a truly free country, which you conservatives don’t want.

– You should never, ever use your military unless your borders are directly violated.

– When you need to go to war (because your borders were directly violated), get over there, kill the bad guys, and then immediately come back home. No country should ever militarily occupy another for a prolonged period.

2. I am against the drug war, which we lost a very long time ago.

Conservatives love to go on and on about small government…until you bring up the topic of drugs. Then they instantly transform into the biggest authoritarian communists you’ve ever seen. Conservatives believe that we should spend billions (if not trillions) of taxpayer dollars to make sure no one puts certain substances into their own bodies.

Not only is this anti-freedom, but this creates massive crime and death, not only in this country, but in countries like Mexico.

The drug war is an utter failure. All drugs should be legal at the federal level, and if individual states want to make certain drugs legal or illegal, that should be up to them. Again, right-wingers love to blather about state’s rights until you bring up the subject of drugs. Then they transform into Stalin.

By the way, this is coming from a guy who doesn’t do drugs, has never done drugs, and thinks using drugs is extremely stupid. Doesn’t matter. I don’t want my government wasting billions of tax dollars on a drug war that simply wastes money and creates more crime.

– All drugs should be 100% legal, at least at the federal level (the states can do what they want).

– What an adult voluntarily puts into his body is his own damn business. The government should have literally nothing to do with that decision.

3. I believe in social freedom.

In a truly free country, which the US is not, if you want to have sex with 100 people, or have gay sex, or marry your pet horse, or gamble your life savings away, or spend all day jerking off to porn, or bang prostitutes, then dammit, that’s your right and you should be allowed to do it, provided everyone involved is a consenting adult.

You may not like those things. I may not like some of those things. But freedom isn’t about pointing the guns of government at everyone to make sure no one does anything you don’t like. Sometimes freedom is a little messy.

Moreover, as I’ve repeatedly explained to right-wingers online, most human beings aren’t going to want to marry a horse. That’s only a very teeny tiny percentage of the vast population. Ever fearful, conservatives seem to think that there are mobs of people waiting around for the government to legalize polygamy or animal-marriage, and the second that happens, they’ll all run out and do it.

No. The vast majority of humans are normal, everyday people who won’t do that crazy shit regardless if it was legal. Therefore, it’s insane for you “small government” people to say that government should tell people exactly what they are not allowed to do or not do in their personal time.

– All prostitution should be legal (provided everyone involved is a consenting, legal adult).

– All types of gambling should be legal.

– All pornography should be legal (except child porn).

– All sexual activity of any kind should be legal (provided everyone involved is a consenting, legal adult).

– All types of romantic or sexual relationships should be legal (provided everyone involved is a consenting, legal adult).

– If you don’t like this stuff, don’t do it and stay away from people who do. It’s called freedom of association. It’s not that tough.

4. I am for absolute free speech.

These days, you right-wingers are actually much better on this than the left-wingers, so I don’t disagree with you too much on this one. I’ll simply point to the free speech article I wrote here if you want more detail.

– There should be literally zero governmental laws regarding what someone can say or write. (That includes saying swear words on TV or the radio, conservatives!)

– If you don’t like what you’re hearing or reading, turn it off and go do something else.

– If someone’s livelihood is damaged by what someone else says or writes, that person can and should sue for libel or slander in a court of law.

5. I believe government should always remain 100% secular.

In a free country, which you conservatives don’t want, the government has nothing whatsoever to do with religion. It does not endorse or oppose any religion. It is not based on any type of religion. Instead, government is very tiny and stays out of people’s way. It’s “religion” is freedom, not Christianity (or any other belief).

I’m not against religion per se. It’s yet another form of false Societal Programming, and if people want to engage in it and it makes them happy to do so, then fine. But the government should have absolutely nothing to do with it.

The split second you demand that government should follow the exact tenets of any religion, you leave the realm of small government and move towards authoritarianism. Instead, government should provide freedom of religion. Anyone can practice any kind of religion they like, as long as they don’t forcibly intrude onto the rights of others.

– Government should not have anything to do with any religion.

– Government should allow any religion to be practiced within its country without restriction.

6. I am 100% opposed to corporatism and corporate welfare.

I’m a capitalist. Most conservatives are not capitalists, they’re corporatists.

I believe that when a big company, or even an entire industry, does something stupid, outdated, or corrupt and loses piles of money, it should go out of business. There will be a temporary painful downturn in that sector (or even the entire economy) while people recover from their losses and/or find new jobs. After a few years, the economy will turn around. It always does and history has shown this. The beauty of capitalism is that it’s a self-correcting system.

Conservatives, who are corporatists, believe that when a big company / industry does something stupid, outdated, or corrupt and loses piles of money, big government should step in and spend billions, if not trillions of dollars and bail these companies out. Taxpayers get ripped off. Customers get ripped off. Incompetent or corrupt CEOs and upper-level managers get rich. The evil people are rewarded, the good people get screwed.

Then the cycle continues forever. These truly evil corporations (coughbigbankscough) keep on lying to people, mismanaging their companies and funds, and keep getting away with it, because some right-wing (and sometimes left-wing) corporatist in power is always there to keep bailing them out with our taxpayer dollars.  How his this small government? How is this the free market? It isn’t.

– Government should never give any corporation money (unless they’re purchasing a specific product or service from them).

– Government should never give any corporation a loan. That’s what banks are for.

– Government should never print money just to bail out a corporation or industry.

So that’s why I’m not a conservative, will never be one, and will never vote for a Republican. They’re pro-war, pro-empire, pro-drug war, against social freedom, somewhat against free speech, want religion intertwined with government, and are usually pro-corporate welfare.

No thanks.

Yeah, I disagree with the left-wing on all kinds of things. That doesn’t mean I agree with right-wingers. Not even close.

6 thoughts on “Why I’m Not A Conservative

  1. I’m also assuming that “All pornography should be legal (except child porn)” is to also carry the caveat of the point below, “provided everyone involved is a consenting, legal adult.”

    With regards to this statement, “or have gay sex, or marry your pet horse, or gamble your life savings away,” there are a few issues with it (which I would imagine you believe, but didn’t communicate… hopefully):

    1. Placing “gay sex” next to the statement “marry your pet horse” unintentionally equates them, and even if one is strongly homophobic, the bottom line here is that consent can only be given in one of the two.
    2. “Gamble your life savings away” as long as there is some form of support for those with addiction. Just because you and I don’t have addictive tendencies, doesn’t mean that other members of society do not. And being able to help people with mental illness allows them to be better members of society rather than leeching off them through homelessness or imprisonment.
    3. You’ve also left out drugs on this list. I’m wondering where you stand on them (and yes, I know it’s not a black and white issue; alcohol and nicotine are also drugs, but equating them to meth and heroin is problematic at the least).

    It’s amusing that you have all these absolutely valid views and belief structure, and yet because Bernie Sanders is a self described democratic socialist, you dismiss him without a thought. Every single one of your views above meshes with his platform. Perhaps you should look a little more deeply into him before dismissing.

    Good post as usual. It’s always nice to see that you’re not as right-wing as you seem. 😉

  2. I’m also assuming that “All pornography should be legal (except child porn)” is to also carry the caveat of the point below, “provided everyone involved is a consenting, legal adult.”

    That’s what “child porn” indicates.

    Placing “gay sex” next to the statement “marry your pet horse” unintentionally equates them,

    Only if you’re a hyper-sensitive left-winger looking for something to be offended by. They are equated only in that they are not societal, conservative, historical norms.

    “Gamble your life savings away” as long as there is some form of support for those with addiction.

    No. Mental health counseling is not the government’s role in a free country (though in the US the individual states could choose to handle this).

    If your position is, “government must provide free mental health services, and if it doesn’t, then government must make gambling illegal,” then you’re a right-winger.

    You’ve also left out drugs on this list. I’m wondering where you stand on them

    Err, go back and re-read the article. Slowly. Pay close attention to item number 2.

    It’s amusing that you have all these absolutely valid views and belief structure, and yet because Bernie Sanders is a self described democratic socialist, you dismiss him without a thought. Every single one of your views above meshes with his platform.

    You’re got to be joking. Sanders and I might agree some social issues, but on fiscal issues I oppose him completely on just about everything he wants. He wants minimum wage to go to $15 an hour, mandatory government healthcare for all, raise taxes on business, force people at gunpoint to pay women the same as men, mandatory government childcare, and on and on. I 100% disagree with all that insane shit. It will simply hasten America’s bankruptcy. We can’t afford all that crap when we’re already running trillion-dollar annual deficits (even if you gut the entire military and raise taxes on rich people to 100%).

    He’s a nice guy, but he’s also insane. No thanks.

  3. I’m a liberal, but what NetBug did drives me crazy. For whatever reason a lot of left wingers love to shut down any conversation around a controversial topic by playing the outrage card. They go right for the emotions preventing people from thinking logically about whatever the person said. They might be right in whatever logical point they’re trying to make, but this tactic feels like something from a dystopian novel.

  4. As I’ve said here many times, that’s what happens with you have a mainstream ideology (left-liberalism) that hates free speech. It makes rational discourse extremely difficult (if not impossible in some cases).

    It’s bizarre that I live in an era where right-wing conservatives are less against free speech than progressives.

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